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The "Death" of Me

Welcome to the first post of this New Year! I know it has been a while since I posted; however, God has been doing some amazing things in my life. If you aren't aware, when God is changing you he takes you through a process and during this process you go through what I call "growing pains". Take the life cycle of a butterfly for example- it goes through 4 different stages and depending on the type of butterfly it can take anywhere from one month to a year to transform! This amazed me because I knew Butterflies went through a process but I had no idea of its details. A Butterfly first starts as an egg, a very small dot on a leaf that has to be examined really closely to see with your natural eye; this is the seed of faith. God tells us in Luke 17:6 “if you have faith as small as a mustard seed you can say to this tree move and it will move.”

The changing process within your spirit starts with your faith- just a small amount of faith will take you places and will do BIG things in your life! The next stage of the Butterflies cycle is when the egg hatches and it transitions into the caterpillar. This is a short lived phase and in fact the caterpillar has an increased intense hunger and needs to eat often so it can begin to grow. This in the spirit is the “seeking God first” part of the spiritual life cycle. The more you eat (God’s word) the more you will grow!! You cannot rush this process and it is not short lived but it’s an ongoing process- remember a Butterflies cycle takes 1 – 12 months and I think we are far more complex as humans than a butterfly so don’t rush the process-embrace the change that is taking place. The third stage of a butterfly is the metamorphosis stage- where a shell forms around the caterpillar and it looks as if it's resting BUT it's not- inside of that shell some major transformation is taking place- it is developing its wings, colors, tissues, and limbs. It is undergoing the changes it will need to become an adult Butterfly. I am in this phase now- I have to “shell” myself right now and allow God to transform me on the inside before I can fully emerge and fly. The last stage of the cycle is the emerging phase where the Butterfly emerges out of its shell and will begin to pump blood through its body so it can prepare to fly. One powerful component about this phase is - once the adult Butterfly has fully emerged he is on the lookout to reproduce quickly so the life cycle can start all over again!!! God is telling me in this very moment that I am to be like that adult Butterfly once I come out of my metamorphosis- seeking other individuals to help go through this process- the spiritual process.

I would be doing you all a dis- service if I only blogged about good and great things, it is my desire to be and remain humble and transparent. One of the changes I have been going through is understanding who I am and why I was created. It took me almost 34 years to discover this truth behind my beautiful face. I was born to help motivate and inspire people of faith who are hurting and looking to fill the void in their life develop a fulfilling and deep relationship with God. I did not have this kind of person in my life growing up so I know God has used my past to push me into this purpose. I have had so many signs of confirmation during these first 3 months of the year and the walk gets a little lonely however I am reminded that in God's word he says" have I not commanded you to be strong and courageous- for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go(Joshua 1:9)". This is a scripture that holds dear and close to my heart because it's going to take God's strength and courage for me to step outside of my comfort zone and walk directly and firmly into the path he has created and designed specifically for me. It will be a lonely journey because God is calling me to “come out of the world and be separate (2 Cor.6:17)”- there are some things that I am going to have to give up and choose not do so I can be who God has called me to be and because of my flesh and what it desires- it’s a growing pain. It will get a little lonely because God has called me to be a prayer warrior and to put others needs before my own and to give up my “what about me attitude.” These are all true honest things I have to rid myself of and I am so willing because I want and choose to live for God. I want to encourage you to spend more time in God’s word- be like the caterpillar hungry for God-seeking what his word says and take it a step further and begin to put it into practice. We are all a work in progress and God has created you for a specific tailor made assignment!! “You do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your Life? Life is like a vapor it appears for a moment and then it vanishes away (James 4?14).” I have spent far too much of my time here on Earth engaging in worldly pleasures when God is tugging on my heart now saying “only what you do for Christ will last”. Stay tuned- A new child of God has been birthed! There are people out in this world seeking God’s face, people who cry tears at night yet smile throughout the day people looking for someone to help guide them to Christ and motivate them to stay in the race- there is work that has to be done.

As I write to encourage, motivate and inspire you, I write to encourage, motivate and sustain myself.

"You are fearfully and wonderfully made"


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